Articles on my life
Just Sisters
Published on September 30, 2004 By bigjimtx In Marital Issues
One year has passed since wife 1 walked out and I have had no contact with her or any of her family since when her sister calls me and invites me to dinner. Smelling a rat I asked if wife 1 would be there and is she interested in trying again. After a long pause and a sigh she admitted that it was her idea and that she wanted to see me in hopes of reconciliation. I politely declined and indicated that I had moved on and the way she handled the separation made it clear I had no choice. Besides I was already seeing the lesser of the two evil sisters.

I had also learned that my X and my mother were now having lunch and good buddies since she left me. This was highly unusual since mom couldn’t stand her while we were married. I will do a later BLOG on this issue as the saga continues.

The place where I was working hired a number of two year temporary employees about the time my wife split and one woman in that group working two offices down the hall was introduced to me and spoke cordially in the hallway for the next few months. That is until she found out I was separated and about to be divorced.

This woman, I’ll call her Cher (not her real name) began going out of her way to speak to me including visiting my office. Cher was bold and assertive and interested in my personnel situation. Cher was married and her husband also worked as part of the temporary force and I know him also. Cher finally indicated that she had a sister that had never been married and that I should meet her.

Hind site is always better than your perception during the time events are occurring. I later realized, after Cher and her hubby had a friend move in with them, that Cher was testing the waters to see if I was interested in such an arrangement. Pawning me off on sis was an after thought when she realized the type of guy I was and that I was not interested in her.

Cher began coming to my office daily 1-3 times to say hi and let me know her sister was interested in meeting me. I resisted fairly hard because Cher was not attractive to me and Chastity (not real name for sis) appeared to look a lot like her and I had to assume their personalities were similar too, which they were not. Cher’s persistence was not paying off so she moved to a new strategy, food, men do follow their stomachs. Cher invited me to lunch with her and her husband for noon that day. I inquired about Chastity being present for lunch and discovered that she would be there and this was a setup.

I gave in and went to lunch with the hope that this would put an end to Cher’s visits and pressure to meet Chastity. Little did I know at the time the pressure was about to go up another notch.

We met at 11:30 and left for a local restaurant within walking distance of the building, Chastity was to meet us there. We arrived and Chastity was there waiting, tall almost 6’0” kind of pear shaped but on the thin side with not much chest to speak of, long black fuzzy hair (witch like), long pointy nose (witch like) broom…no just kidding but…she would not have needed extensive makeup to be in the Wizard of Oz.

Chastity was soft spoken, intelligent and independent. I was not interested beyond this lunch and Cher made sure I had her number before we went back to the office. This is where Cher steps up the pace and starts coming to my office even more often and staying longer. I left the office on occasion just to get rid of her. This went on everyday for three weeks and I finally agreed to call Chastity. I called Chastity and we talked for about 15 and she invited me to visit her apartment (said the spider to the fly, oops) and I accepted and went to see her on Saturday.

Chastity’s apartment was clean and neat and she was a very good hostess and we had a nice two hour visit. I agreed to visit again the next Saturday and we talked on the phone every day for a few minutes. Cher mysteriously stopped coming to my office and I barely saw her after Chastity and I started talking The next Saturday was rainy and cool so Chastity and I went to a movie and back to her place where a discussion on sex evolved (not sure how).

Before I could turn and run, my maleness took over and we retired to her bedroom (the layer). Despite it being her time we were both lonely and ready and….well we dated for six months after that and were married. We all make foolish mistakes and this would have been a whopper had we not had a son in the process, but again I am getting ahead of myself.

Chastity was working in a retail store with a BA degree so I had her do a resume and eventually got her an administrative position in a different group of the company where I worked. Over the years she rose through the ranks to a professional position and is now a department head. She has done a good job raising our son without me because when I was able to visit they were ALWAYS busy or out of town so I rarely saw my child (she did manage to cash 21 years of child support payments however).

Our lives were set well with both incomes, professional jobs in a secure company so we decided to have a child. It took 7 months of hard work but Chastity was expecting and we had our son. The trouble started almost immediately after our son was born.

Chastity and I grew apart quickly as Jason became the center of our busy lives. Chastity was so busy at work she could not talk to me on the phone for more than a few minutes. Later it dawned on me that she had time for a Yoga class and had been taking books to read, not so busy I realized after the blow up.

One day at the water cooler, which was right around the corner from the elevators, I overheard two “friends” discussing the affair Chastity was openly having (she worked in a building across town). I called her immediately and said to meet me in the park in front of the building where I confronted her with what I heard. There was barely any denial a basic attitude of so what; it’s none of your business.

Chastity rented a town home when Jason was 8 months old and told me she was moving out. I refused to let her move with my child or anything from our home with the exception of her clothes until a property settlement custody agreement was reached and filed with the courts. It was a very difficult month and I insisted on sleeping in our bed as did she, one on each edge. I found out her friend was already living in the town home for two or three weeks before the settlement was complete.

It turned out her sister introduced them and found Chastity’s attorney too. What a nice sister.

Well that’s the short story of marriage number two and its demise stay tuned for marriage number three…………

Comments
on Sep 30, 2004
ummm wow

I feel for you, dude.
on Sep 30, 2004
big..........what a mess. it sounds like the mess i would have been in if i had married a certain woman.
on Oct 10, 2004
Be greatful you were wiser than I in this regard and thanks for reading my blog.
on Oct 10, 2004
Thank you for you reply and feeling.....the story continues when I get a chance to post it.
on Oct 10, 2004
Holy sheep sh1t Jim,
Hope you are doing ok now.
on Oct 13, 2004
Read about my girlfriend...I am doing great! And thanks for your concerns....

Jim
on Oct 13, 2004
Thanks man it all good now....